9 questions about anal sex you've been too afraid to ask — answered

To anyone uninitiated, anal sex can be one of the most confusing sex acts out there.

But anal play is becoming less taboo across many demographics. Things like anilingus (oral action in and around the anus) to pegging (using a sex toy to penetrate someone's anus) have been represented on shows like "Girls" and "Broad City." And, according to a 2011 report from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), 44 percent of straight men and 36 percent of straight women said they'd had anal sex at some point in their lives. 

These things may or may not change your personal opinion on anal sex. But, either way, it can't hurt to understand it a little better.

To help with that, INSIDER asked sex expert and relationship coach Lia Holmgren and Daniel Saynt, founder of The New Society for Wellness, a millennial members club that hosts sexual education workshops, to address all of the questions you have — and maybe a few more — about anal sex.

1. Does anal sex always hurt?

If done properly, anal sex should be more pleasurable than painful. But in order to achieve this, there needs to be some careful preparation leading up to the act.

"The anus needs to be carefully trained, starting with fingers, smaller butt plugs, and dildos before you can insert a penis or a big dildo," Holmgren told INSIDER.

You will also need to have some lube close by because the anus doesn't produce the lubrication needed to make penetration comfortable.

"The best rule is, take your time and use lots of lube," Holmgren told INSIDER. "If you are trying with a trusted partner, and you don't need to use condoms, you can do it with any sort of lubricant from water-based to oils. If you need to use condoms, only use water-based lubricants that won't destroy the condoms. "

2. Will anal make you poop?

Short answer? Yes. But not always — and there are some things you can do to prevent it.

"Our bum is a place where the poop comes out and if we choose to put something up there, yes, sometimes anal sex can make you poop," Holmgren told INSIDER. "Know that some days are better than others to try anal sex."

To prevent unwanted bowel movements during anal, Holmgren recommends avoiding spicy food and ensuring you poop at some point during the day before sex happens. If you're feeling constipated, you might want to pass on anal that day, because anal play could stimulate a bowel movement.

Still, no matter how well you prepare, anal might feel a little odd the first few times you try it.

"When there is something entering your anus through an anal sphincter, it feels similarly as when something goes out through the same sphincter," Holmgren told INSIDER. "Don't let it confuse you and try to focus more on the pleasure. Have an open communication with your partner and if you feel like you may have a bowel movement during sex, slowly pull out and go to the bathroom."

In the end, sex can be pretty messy, so anal might be messy too. If you're uncomfortable with this, you can keep a towel or some post-play wipes on hand, or just plan on hopping in the shower when you're done.

3. Does anal feel good for people with vaginas?

Many people with vaginas find anal sex pleasurable — but why?

"Not only there are tons of nerve endings in the anal canal which aren't present in [the] vagina, but you can also orgasm through the indirect stimulation of [the] clitoris," Holmgren told INSIDER. "This little organ is shaped like a wishbone, and you can only see the little part on the outside, but the two long legs extend all the way down to our anus in some women."

The shape of the clitoris can also help some people attain the mythical G-spot orgasm through anal penetration. So as long as you're going safely and slowly into anal sex, your chances of it feeling great are pretty high.